At school I had loads of friends that were boys but never had many boyfriends. I kind of forgot about them in primary school when I kissed (well, more like a peck) my first boyfriend at the back of the oval in grade 4. He then proceeded to tell everyone in the canteen line that afternoon during lunch. I was mortified – he had boy germs!!
When I left school and started hitting the town with my girlfriends we met heaps of different people. We used to go out every night of the week, but we would always go to the same place every Friday night without fail to watch a band play. Some of us went out to have a dance and some of us went out purely to ‘pick up’. I was the one who went out to have a bit of a dance. There was a party pash here and there but nothing to bore you with. I was usually designated driver anyway so I never had the dutch courage I needed to just go and pick someone up. How embarrassing! The rejection would be humiliating! I would literally die!
One of my friends boyfriends came with us one week and invited his basketball team to come along. My future husband was in his basketball team. A friend introduced us and once upon a time begun. We talked all night and really got to know each other.
The following week there were a few phone calls, messages, a couple of movies and dinner.
The next Friday night my future husband and I were sitting outside the pub singing to a song that was playing inside. The song was “Hey Baby” and he sang it to me: ‘Hey, hey baby, ooo ahh, i wanna knooo o o oow if you’ll be my girl…?’ *enter GIGANTIC pause*, then he asked me if I would be his girlfriend. So from there we became ‘offiicial’, ‘exclusive’.
I hadn’t had a boyfriend in quite a while. Sure, I had a hook up here and there but nothing I would dignify with an actual title! So when I talked to anyone about my boyfriend I felt a bit silly really. I felt like I was telling anyone who would listen about my boyfriend – like, hello, excuse me everyone, can I please have your attention – I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!!
A few years later, we got engaged and my boyfriend became my ‘fiancé’. So when I talked to anyone about my fiancé I still felt a bit silly really. I felt like I was telling everyone about my fiancé – who proposed – who I was getting married to – like, hello, excuse me everyone, can I please have your attention – I HAVE A FIANCÉ AND WE ARE GETTING MARRIED AND WE ARE GOING TO LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER!! I must have been so boring during this time in my life. I don’t think I talked about anything but THE wedding!
I thought about using the term ‘partner’ although I think this made me sound like I was either an older person that never got married or gay which I am neither so decided to stick it out and get over it.
Now that I’m married I’m more comfortable with using the term husband. The truth is I love my husband to the moon and back and I’m so lucky to have him…. He’s lucky to have me too… and don’t worry, I remind him of this every day!
Love Kirst xx